Friday 8 December 2017

Hello Strangers

So I know I haven't written a blog post in a VERY long time so I have absolutely loads to catch you all up on.

Little update on my life in general, I did my a levels and surprisingly didn't completely fail and landed myself a place at Middlesex University to study children's nursing and fast forward 3 months.... I'm a term down, loving it and going onto start my placement in a hospital in the new year- how crazy is that!!!!! Me. A girl with a chronic illness. At uni. Partying. Living away from home. Heck- I've even managed to score a boyfriend.

You'd think with all the positivity and energy buzzing around that I would be ontop of the world right? Nope. I AM 100% SHITTING MYSELF! I really am becoming an adult, going into a career where I look after people... but I don't even feel like I can look after myself.

Don't get me wrong, I'm bloody happy... I am socially really moulding into the 'self' I felt that I would never recover after my teen years went so tits up. And if I was a regular 18 year old I'd be pretty chuffed right now.

But unfortunately for me, Endo doesn't like it that way and she has still managed to crop up and ruin some of the events that should've been the most memorable of my life... so how do you deal with that? Well in the last 3 months, away from my parents and the good old safety of the pastoral care team at school... you go day by day. I am learning that thinking into the future is too fucking scary! It really is, and that doesn't mean avoiding your responcibilities it means focussing on one at a time; respective of time. Worrying about my life 5 years from now won't help me today. In fact, worrying about my life tomorrow will make today 10 times worse.

So I guess the message of this cheeky blog post is take it easy- try not to worry about the future and live for today, because today, you may get an hour, a minute or a precious second of the pain easing and those moments should be cherished- not used to worry over.

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